39 weeks and 1 day, still at 1 cm :( I'm feeling pretty bummed, I was hoping we'd be at 2. Doctor won't let me go more than one week past my due date, so if she's not here by next Wednesday then we need to pick her birthdate so I can be induced :( I really don't want to be induced. I want her to come on her own and I know things don't always go as planned and as long as she's healthy it's all that matters, but I can't help but feel heartbroken. I worry that I'll be induced, be in labor forever (at the hospital not even in the comfort of my home), and in the end be told I need a c-section. I know everyone has a vision of what their labor will be like and 99% of the time it never goes the way we want it, but it still bums me out. I know I will be happy when I see her and at that moment it won't matter, but as of now I'm keeping my fingers and toes crossed that she will come out on her own this week. I think more than anything I'm scared. Yesterday when I thought it might be it, I was very excited and giddy, but actually knowing when it's going to happen makes me more nervous and scared. I stress out when trying to plan things, surprises are much better. So, starting today after the doctor's visit I walked forever at a shopping center, until my feet were double their size. I will be going for walks every day and trying other things to help get things going. I'm trying really hard to be happy that I will get to see her soon, but my fears are taking over. Can't wait until Chris gets home from work, I just want to lay with him....
* PPPPLLLLLEEEEAAAASSSEEEEE come out!:) Mommy doesn't want to be induced. She's really scared. She wants you to come out on your own. I don't want to kick you out. Please Baby Girl??? You will like it out here. You will get tons of love and kisses. And you have room to stretch out! A comfy bed, Mommy and Daddy's arms, and your puppies can't wait to lick you :) Please come out this week. If not, then Mommy will have to pick your birthdate. I don't know what day is good for you :) I really can't wait to see you, I just want you to come out on your own, no drugs. We love you, see you in less than 2 weeks for sure...
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Scared to Death Mommy
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